Ellen DeGeneres

Big WTF?

Now like a good homo, I love our favorite primetime lesbo Ellen DeGeneresas much as the rest of you, but why is she doing replacing Paula and judging American Idol? I guess she's really bored hosting her daily talk show. I mean she is never going to overtake the big O in ratings and having the number 1 lesbian talk show so I guess this is her next career move. Maybe the former "closeted" gay Adam Lambert inspired her. I don't know what it is about Idol that rubs me the wrong way. We did get Kelly Clarkson out of the deal, but the show jumped the shark a few seasons ago after William Hung sung "She Bangs". Oh yes, I went there! But I do find it ironic that the homophobic Fox network is calling upon a big ol' lesbian to boost their ratings.

I really hope Ellen sports a giant Coca-Cola cup filled with vodka every show. That's the only way I can believe that she legitimately belongs on the show as a judge, but we will see how she does this season. It will certainly be comical.

Ooh, I wonder if she'll call out to Ryan Seacrest. "Hey GURRL! How you doin'?" Now that would be worth the whole fucking experience. What do you think?