Visconti Triplets

After much hubbub from last year's breaking news, one of the gay porn "Spider-Man" twins was finally sentenced to start serving his time in Oz. Keyontyli and Taleon Goffney were arrested in February 2008 for busting into area businesses by cutting rooftop holes to gain entry. According to the Philadelphia Daily News' 2008 post, they were charged with breaking into Moon's Beauty Shop at 9th and Washington Streets in South Philadelphia and the adjoining Wings and More, using only a handsaw and ax to get in through the roofs.

What really raised eyebrows - as well as more than a few crotches, I'm sure - was the recounting of an earlier arrest of Taleon in 2006. Police nabbed Taleon with crack cocaine and a loaded .25-caliber automatic. While handcuffed in the back of the moving cop car, he smashed out the rear window by head-butting it, and then dove head-first through it. After landing on his face, he stood and, while still handcuffed, fled on foot and into a nearby pond. "He swam across like Flipper, taunting officers saying, 'You'll never catch me!' Fierce!

The 2009 GAYVNs came, saw, and Hail Mary (in keeping with the football theme) without question conquered. The ceremony took place Saturday, March 28, 2009, at the historic Castro Theatre in San Francisco, CA, and we were front-row-and-center.

After remaining “locked” and unchanged for quite some time, a bunch of new nomination categories debuted this year: From the notable (Best Bottom, Best Top, Best Fetish Performer, and Best HD/Hi-Def) to the "What Took You So Long?" field (for the first time ever, Website and Web Performer categories were finally added to the lineup - but about about 10 years late, in our opinion; hey, at least they're getting their due).

To no one’s surprise Raging Stallion Studios’s mega-hyped mega-epic To the Last Man went home with the most awards - 13 wins out of 19 nominations - including nods for the coveted Best Picture and Director. Who says rape will get you nowhere?

The minor controversy that erupted early on - the show was “presented” by Naked Sword, whose parent company “merged” with Raging Stallion, giving the illusion (to some) of a conflict of interest - was nothing compared to remarks from the one and only Michael Lucas. Mr. Lucas stormed the stage to castigate GAYVN and the judges in protest when Brent Corrigan snagged an award. (Mr. Corrigan, if you remember, had been caught performing when he was underage for Cobra Video, causing quite an uproar within the industry.) Association of Sites Advocating Child Protection (ASACP) executive director Joan Irvine had just accepted a special award from a San Francisco city solicitor, and Mr. Lucas flew into a rage that Mr. Corrigan had won an award from an awards organization that had just lauded a company that works tirelessly to keep children far away from adult content and exploitation. It was quite the drama, which continued into the night when Mr. Corrigan’s boyfriend (allegedly) threatened Mr. Lucas at the afterparty. Police were called, the blogosphere lit up like a Christmas tree, and “he said/he said” battles raged on.

The show’s three hosts - comic Margaret Cho, supermodel/hellrasier Janice Dickinson, and Alec Mapa from ABC’s Ugly Betty – absolutely killed, weaving into the evening an ever-hilarious stream on un-PC comments, bitchy remarks, and jaw-dropping moments. When TLA Releasing’s Wrangler: Anatomy of an Icon snagged the award for Best Alternative Release (yeah, that’s right!), TLA’s Managing Director Erik Schut was handed the “hunk of lucite” (as Bruce Vilanch put it) by Hot House head honcho Steven Scarborough, the even-better-looking-in-person Kyle King, and Miss Dickinson, who gave Mr. Schut a huge hug, said “congrats honey!” and gave him a huge smack on the lips. (Mr. Schut remarked his lips went numb and were slathered in gloss.) Mr. Schut also was seen escorting the Visconti Triplets around all weekend, the lucky bastard. Overall, it was the most elaborate ceremony yet, and you can be certain we’ll be there to soak in every moment next year, too! Click here for the full list of winners.